lexiesloan (lexiesloan) wrote,

Hunger Hurts and I Want Him So Bad (Mark/Lexie)

I stayed home from work today because I was feeling as if a mack truck ran me over and lying in bed, I wrote this. It is the third set of vignettes I have written about Mark and Lexie and their family life. I do not know if I should keep writing these because I am not sure if anyone really cares about reading them but these are so much fun to write and they make me smile. Just drop me a comment if you like reading these and let me know which drabble out of this addition that you like the most. 


Sadie meets and starts dating a new guy, Tom, some downtown lawyer, and after about a month of seeing him, she finally decides that she wants him to meet her family.


They come over to Mark and Lexie’s house where Lexie has bought steaks and gives them to Mark to cook on the grill, along with baked potatoes wrapped in tinfoil and some fresh asparagus she has bought at the farmers market. It is a beautiful, early-fall Seattle day and they outside at the patio table on the deck.


Lexie is sweet as always, Mark interrogates him like a big brother and Owen is stoic and silent like years of army training taught him to be, simply watching and observing. Sadie is so nervous, she barely eats anything.


When they are done with the meal, Lexie begins to clear the table and Sadie jumps up to help her, following her into the kitchen with a stack of dirty dishes. She smokes when she’s nervous and she pulls a pack of cigarettes from her purse but Lexie snatches them away before she can light one. Sadie then looks out the window above the sink that overlooks the back deck and watches as Mark continues questioning Tom.


She feels horrible for when Ally and Ellie start dating and bringing boys home. Mark is going to be a complete nightmare.   



Mark is sleeping on the couch, the late night news glowing on the television screen, his head propped up on a couple of throw pillows. Lexie watches him for a moment and then with a small smile, she slowly climbs onto the couch, crawling up his body. The instant she kisses him, he wakes up and he smirks as she sits up, straddling him, smiling down at him. His hands glide up her sides until they are cupping the sides of her neck and he pulls her down for another kiss.


“What are you doing?” He asks, barely pulling his lips from hers to form the question.


Lexie smiles. “Seducing you,” she replies, her fingers gliding through his hair, holding the back of his head, and he inhales a sharp breath as she presses herself against him.


“Last time we did this here, we got Ellie,” he reminds her with another smirk and she laughs softly before kissing him again.



“You must be so proud of your husband,” the buxom blonde says, giving Lexie a too-sugary, overly fake smile. She has been giving Mark smiles all night – something she has been none too subtle about.


Lexie smiles politely nonetheless, recognizing her as one of the scrub nurses from the hospital. “I could not be more proud of him,” she agrees whole-heartedly though she is refraining from throwing her champagne in the woman’s face as she looks at Mark across the room and actually licks her lips.


Unfortunately for Lexie, she is used to women blatantly flirting and trying to come onto Mark, most not caring whether or not Lexie is standing right in front of them. It isn’t exactly something Lexie wanted to get used to but she did nonetheless and she tightens her fingers around the flute glass, keeping her smile on her face.


There is a party that night in Mark’s new practice, all of their friends and most of the staff coming to help him celebrate. Richard Webber has shown up, mainly to try and convince Mark to stay on at the hospital. He doesn’t have another surgeon nearly as talented to take over plastics and certainly not one who is able to perform such reconstructive procedures as Mark can.  


Mark isn’t interested though, laughing and shaking his head.


“Any idea when you’ll come back to the hospital?” The blonde asks.


Lexie keeps the polite smile on her face. “Ellie is turning a year in November and I didn’t return until Ally was at least a year old.”


The blonde nods as if she finds it fascinating. “Well, I just think it’s so sweet that you stay at home with yours and Mark’s kids while he’s out every day working. It’s so… 1950ish of you.”


Lexie’s grip on her glass tightens but she doesn’t say anything. The blonde excuses herself with a flirtatious giggle and Lexie watches as she crosses the room to sidle up next to Mark. He doesn’t even glance at her though as he continues the conversation he is having with Derek and Meredith. Lexie downs the rest of her champagne and places the empty glass on a tray that a caterer passes by carrying.


She needs fresh air and standing on the sidewalk just outside the front glass doors of the office, Dr. Mark Sloan, M.D., Plastic Surgeon, ENT, F.A.C.S printed on them in white lettering, she rubs her hands up and down her arms to keep herself warm as she tilts her head up and looks at the dark night sky.


She gasps with fright when a pair of arms suddenly wrap around her from behind and his familiar chuckle fills her ears.


“Don’t scare me,” she chides and he smirks, tightening his arms around her, his front forming to her back. “What are you doing out here?”


“I was just about to ask you the same thing,” Mark says, his lips brushing across her ear, his hot breath sending a shiver down her spine.


Lexie is quiet for a moment, resting the back of her head against his shoulder and closing her eyes as his embrace offers warmth. “I don’t want to be like Bailey,” she whispers before she can convince herself not to. “I don’t want to be constantly torn between being a surgeon and being a mom and no matter what she does, she never seems happy.”


She turns to face him, his arms still around her, but he lifts a hand to wipe away at a tear rolling down her cheek that she hadn’t even realized had fallen.


“Everyone keeps asking me when I am coming back to the hospital,” she says.


“You go back whenever you want to, Lex,” he responds but falls silent again when she shakes her head.


“I don’t want to put Ellie in daycare. I don’t want to miss picking Ally up from kindergarten. I don’t want to always be at the hospital and leaving our daughters with friends and babysitters.”


“Lexie,” Mark tries to interject.


“My mom stayed at home and I think I had one of the best childhoods because of that,” Lexie blurts out and then closing her eyes, she wraps her arms around his waist and he hugs her as she presses her forehead against his jawline. “What are people going to think if I decide not to go back to the hospital?”


“Who gives a fuck what people think?” He asks and she tilts her head up to look at him again, her doe eyes glassed over with tears. “Oh, Lex,” he whispers. He cups her face. “You do whatever you want to. No matter what, you know I am going to support you.”


She nods her head, having never doubted that as she spent hours and days thinking about this. Still, there is a knot in her throat and she tries to swallow past it. “I think, right now, I just want to focus on our family.”


Mark looks at her intently for a moment, his eyes searching hers as if to make sure that this is what she really wants and then he breaks into a smile before kissing her.


“Whatever you want,” he whispers and she feels the stress knot that has been forming in her chest beginning to loosen and completely disappear.



“We don’t talk,” Derek confides in him as they walk through the park, Mark, pushing Ellie in her stroller and keeping an eye on Ally as she runs ahead towards the playground with Charlie on her heels. “We fight but we don’t talk.”


“So what do you do?” Mark asks.


Derek shrugs. “Have sex mostly. She doesn’t want to talk. Just have sex.”


Mark smirks. “The perfect woman then.”


“I’ll tell Lexie you said that,” Derek says wryly.


“Careful, Ally!” Mark calls out to her as she scrambles up the ladder of the slide.


It is an overcast day and the park is nearly deserted except for a couple other kids with their moms, the blowing wind carrying Ally’s giggles as she slides down, Charlie meeting her at the bottom and licking her face.


Derek plops down on the bench and taking Ellie from the stroller, Mark sits down on the ground, placing Ellie on her wobbly feet. She can stand alone without holding onto furniture for a moment or two before falling and Mark keeps his hands just a hairsbreadth away from her body, ready to catch her if she falls. She can walk now holding onto things as well and Mark can’t wait to see when she can walk independently.  


When Ally took her first steps across the kitchen floor on her own, he had been at the hospital in surgery and despite Lexie videotaping it for him, he has always hated himself for missing such a milestone with their first daughter. He doesn’t want to miss Ellie’s.


“How’s yours and Lexie’s sex life?” Derek asks.


Mark smirks, not even having to answer the question.


“I’ve been trying to get Meredith to at least entertain the idea of having a baby,” Derek admits, watching Mark and Ellie as the baby takes a hesitant step forward, her fingers wrapped tightly around Mark’s finger as he holds her up.


Sometimes, despite what his eyes see, he still can’t believe that Mark Sloan is a father.     


Mark laughs. “Whoa, Shep. Slow down. It was a miracle you got her to even marry you in the first place. You keep pushing her and she is going to run for the hills.”


Derek frowns. “You and Meredith are exactly alike so how did Lexie make you want to have kids?”


“She didn’t make me want to have anything,” Mark shakes his head. “I wanted this.”



It seems that any time they fight, it is over Thatcher.


Mark finds out that Lexie went over to his house to clean up and to fix him some dinners that can be stored in the freezer. She had also brought Ellie with her when she went despite knowing that Mark doesn’t want Thatcher anywhere near their girls – especially since he has fallen off the wagon again.


They get into a fight, screaming and shouting at one another in the kitchen before Mark finally storms out, slamming the front door behind him as he leaves.


“You want to slam doors?” Lexie yells after him. She opens the front door and then slams it shut again. “That’s how you slam a door!”



He comes back two hours later, smelling of neither alcohol or cheap perfume. Lexie is sitting on the floor of their master bathroom, leaning against the bathtub, balled up Kleenexes on the floor around her and her eyes red from crying. He stands in the doorway for a few moments, looking at her, before sitting down next to her, slipping his arm around her shoulders, pulling her towards him. 


Neither speak.


She rests her head on his shoulder and he sighs, his cheek against her forehead. She shifts herself, sliding one arm between his waist and the bathtub and the other fisting the material of his shirt over his heart. Mark tightens his arm around her shoulders and covers her hand with his. They don’t know how long they stay like that but it feels like hours.



Mark comes home to find Lexie sitting on the couch with Ellie sitting in her lap and Ally kneeling on the floor, leaning over the coffee table, the tip of her tongue pursed between her lips in deep concentration.


“Daddy, I can’t get the Charley horse!” Ally exclaimed, looking at him and he sees that she is playing a game of Operation. “Mommy can get it but she says I should learn to get it on my own, too.”


“Well, I’ll help you out this time, Suzie Q,” he says, shrugging out of his jacket, dropping it onto the back of the chair and kneeling down on the floor next to Ally, looking down at the game in front of him. “Tweezers.”


“Tweezers,” she repeats with the utmost seriousness and slaps them into his open hand.


Lexie smiles, laughing softly, and both Mark and Ally lean over the game, Mark’s steady hand slowly guiding the tweezers down to the small horse resting in the hole on what is supposed to be the patient’s hip joint. His hand suddenly jerks though and the tweezers hit the metal edge of the opening, causing the buzzer to sound and the patient’s nose to light up red.


“Son of a bitch,” Mark grumbles and Lexie can’t help but laugh. He gives her a look but it only makes her laugh harder and Mark looks at Ally, who is looking as shocked as he is. “Alright,” he says and then bends his head to one side and then the other, cracking his neck, preparing himself. “We’re going again.”



“Are you sure she isn’t too young for this?” Lexie asks as they enter the pet store.


“We already have a dog and that mole in the back, ruining our yard – which Charlie should have caught by now. What’s one more animal to add to the mix?” Mark says with a grin. “Just think of us as Noah’s Ark.


“I worry that we spoil her.”


“This’ll be good for her, Lex. It teaches her responsibility and all of that other bullshit. And it’s either this or get her that turtle she wants.”


“Dada,” Ellie says, pointing a finger to a cage that Ally is standing at. The eleven-month-old is able to say dada, mama, Ally, and when she says what sounds like Chaw, she is referring to Charlie.


“Mommy! Come look at these!” Ally exclaims excitedly, beckoning them over. “I want that one.” She points to one of the cottontail rabbits with a grayish-brown coat and long ears that are currently bent flat against its back.


Lexie bends down to look through the cage at the rabbit Ally is pointing to. “Oh, Mark,” she melts, forgetting all of her earlier protests. “Look at it. It is so adorable.”


Mark smirks, watching both Lexie and Ally gush over the rabbit. He isn’t surprised that Lexie wasn’t that hard to win over.



Tom cheats on Sadie and she comes to the house in tears and Lexie holds her on the couch, doing the best she can to console her. Both Mark and Owen offer to beat the living shit out of him. Sadie almost takes them up on it.



Meredith goes grocery shopping with Lexie, needing to get out of the house and away from Derek for a little bit, and she watches with complete amazement and slight horror as Lexie juggles all of the shopping and two small children without losing her mind. She pushes the cart up and down each aisle, checking things off her list, not even blinking as Ellie begins crying and wants to be held and telling Ally what she can and cannot get when the girl asks for what seems like everything she sees on the shelves.


After going to back to the house and helping Lexie unload all of the groceries, Meredith then drives to Joe’s instead of back to her own house. And as she does shots of tequila with Cristina, she swears silently to herself that she is never going to have a baby. She isn’t Lexie and she never wants to be.



Ally dresses like a bumblebee and Ellie like a pumpkin for Halloween and along with Charlie, Mark takes them all over the neighborhood for trick-or-treating. When they come back and Lexie checks all of Ally’s candy to make sure that everything looks good and is unopened, Ally gets to eat one piece and watch It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown before both girls are put to bed for the night.


In their own bedroom, Lexie changes into her costume that she has bought for Mark’s eyes only in the bathroom and when she comes out, Mark is sitting on the bed and his mouth falls open when he sees just what she has picked out.


She laughs and comes to stand in front of him, asking him if he likes what he sees. She shrieks with surprised laughter when he grabs her suddenly and flips her onto her back, putting her body underneath his.


“I am never going to be able to read Little Red Riding Hood to Ally again,” he says and she laughs seconds before he kisses her deeply and pushes her already too-short red skirt up around her waist.



“Ally, tell your daddy about school today,” Lexie suggests with a mysterious smile on her face that Mark doesn’t trust as they sit at the kitchen table for dinner.


Ally smiles widely at him as he begins cutting her chicken breast for her. She takes a deep breath, preparing to give a rambling that will make her mom proud. “It was raining outside so we had our playtime inside and there is only one Fisher Price airplane and this kid Brandon always gets it before anyone else so he always get to play with it. But today, I beat him to it so I got to play with it and he called me a stupid girl so I pushed him onto the ground-”


“That a girl,” Mark smirks proudly, grabbing his glass of water to take a sip.


“And the teacher put me in timeout and then Brandon came up to me and told me that I can play with the plane tomorrow if I want and I am in love with Brandon!” Ally finishes with an enthusiastic exclamation and Mark chokes on his water.


Lexie laughs softly as she watches Mark’s reaction at their five-year-old daughter saying those words and for one of the few times in his life, Mark Sloan is completely speechless. He has no idea what to say.



Lexie wakes up extra early on the morning of Ellie’s first birthday and with Mark still sleeping deeply in their bed, she sneaks into the bathroom, locking the door behind her. Reaching underneath the sink, inside her box of Tampax where she hid it after buying it, she pulls out a pregnancy test. Taking a deep breath – having more than enough experience with taking these – she quickly pees on the stick and then setting it down on the counter, she washes her hands and sits down on the edge of the bathtub, waiting.


Her stomach is in knots and she wants to throw up but it is almost as if she is too nervous to do so. She chews on the skin around her fingernails, her knee bouncing up and down – a fidgety habit she has picked up from Mark – and she mentally kicks herself for forgetting to bring a watch in with her.


After what feels like an eternity, she finally stands up, her knees feeling shaky, and she crosses the bathroom. Picking up the plastic white stick and seeing the pink positive plus sign, she can’t stop the tears that almost immediately fill her eyes and she prays that the test is wrong. Oh god, she really is the Sloan baby machine. 



Tags: pairing: mark sloan/lexie grey, show: grey's anatomy, story: family

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